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Louise used to model herself after Joey
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Hangout Review
Dawson’s Creek Marathon
My Mom’s house in Boise, Idaho
October 23, 2004
Damnit, Joey. Taking some time away from Dawson might’ve seemed like the right decision for your well being, but what about us? Did you, even for a second, consider what was best for your audience? We’re stuck with episode after episode of Dawson’s weep and whine. So, thanks, Joey; I hope you fall for a gay dude.
I was visiting my mother. She lives in Boise, and it gets cold up there in October. So, when my teenage sister (Louise) and her boyfriend (Keith) wanted to take me to an outdoor haunted house on Saturday night, I pretended like it was just too cold for my thinned So Cal blood. (“Way chilly, braugh.”) I feigned fatigue and let out a big sigh… “Let’s just stay in and watch a DVD.”
Louise took the bait and followed with, “I have Dawson’s Creek complete second season!” I’d seen the DVD on her shelf earlier.
“I suppose that would do,” I could hardly disguise my glee, “but we’re going to need lots of ice cream!”
We got back from the store with a bag full of coffee flavored Häagen-Dazs and some Boone’s Farm Strawberry Surprise and settled on the poofy couch for teen-freakout. Joey and Dawson seemed perfect for each other, but there was trouble in paradise and Joey decides she needs some time off. While taking said time, Jen, who still has feelings for Dawson, tries to seduce him. Joey and Jack bond over art and their blossoming relationship gets physical during an incident involving nude modeling and a boner! All the while Pasty’s busy with his new crush, the goodie-two-shoed Andie (Jack’s sister). We all know that Pasty is a fuck up, but Andie’s positive influence has him working hard and he even gets an A on the math test. That’s his first A, guys; you go Pasty!
Let’s see… Andie and Jack’s mom is nuts, Dawson’s parents are getting a divorce (despite that one slip up with the dishwasher and an unbelievable set of pecs), and Jen drinks so much her face actually begins to define the word “rotund.” Then my sister told me that Abby was going to die at the end of the season.
“What? SHUT-UP. You’re ruining it for me.” And I threw a pillow at her.
We jumped on the couch for a little bit after that and Louise spilled her wine on the jigsaw puzzle we’d been working on earlier that day. Then Pasty and Andie had sex at a bed and breakfast, things changed for a little bit, there was crying, and then the couple was tighter than ever. Louise threw an almond at me and I ignored her. Jen met some new guy named Ty, Dawson made some boring movie and the whole gang hung out all-night and crammed for an English test.
I woke up with my legs on the couch and my body on the ground, a spoon was stuck in the bottom of the ice cream bowl next to my head and I had a splitting, candy-corn headache. I knew we’d made it through season two, but I felt a bit empty. Sure, I learned a lot about Dawson and his creek, but there were more questions than answers. First and foremost, whom would I rather marry? Dawson or Pasty? I suppose there’s only one way to ever really know. Louise, if you are reading this pretend like you’re surprised when you open your Christmas present and it’s the Dawson’s Creek complete third season.
“So open up your morning light,
And say a little prayer for I
You know that if we are to stay alive,
Then see the love in every eye.
I don’t wanna wait…”
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